this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
