Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
I want to make a zoo with you.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.