And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
