At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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