Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Every concussion has its silver lining
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
