Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
