I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
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