we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
