gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
We are two peas in an std pod
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
