A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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