Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
