Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
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