if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.