hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
