Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
