Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
I just found puke in my bra..
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
