I'm so fucking centered right now
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Randomize