I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
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