yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
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I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
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Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
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