We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize