4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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