just survived the first fart of the relationship.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Sext me about skeletons
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
βͺI got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse. β¬
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