Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
false alarm. still invincible.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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