I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize