so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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