What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
