just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
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