but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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