that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
