so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
