I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
