when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
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Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
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and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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