I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
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