So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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