I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
