Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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