i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Randomize
