I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
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