is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
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