Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
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i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
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Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
It's rum buckets o'clock
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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