i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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