we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Randomize