It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
