so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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