Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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