i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
