Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
