also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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