You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Randomize
