Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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